Matteo's Birth Story

I came to Brazil so be with Samuel when Matteo was born. If Samuel wasn’t here, well, I guess it wouldn’t have chosen to come here to give birth…
After waiting and waiting for Matteo to make his grand appearance, on February 22, I started to feel some goings ons… my water broke around five in the morning and I started having some light cramping. Nothing real strong, so I just rested for most of the day until that evening when the cramping got to be five minuets apart.
When we got to the hospital I signed in and then walked through the double doors to the ward alone which is resticted except for patients only while samuel and mom stayed in the waiting area. I took my place in the line of the plastic chairs ouside the door to the examination room behind a few other women who were waiting to see the doctor. When it was my turn, I asked if Samuel could come in from the waiting area and translate for me. Thankfully they allowed Samuel to come in. At the women's public hospital here in Sao Goncalo, absolutely no one is allowed in except the patient outside of visiting hours..or hour.
She examined me as he explained my water had broken that morning and now I’m having light contractions at 5 minutes apart. Pretty normal. Or so I thought….
It’s funny because my mom had called me before she arrived a few weeks earlier. Said she had done some research on childbirth in Brazil out of curiosity and apparently, a huge percentage of Brazilian women have cesarean births… Its become more of a cultural thing rather than a last resort as in the United States. She told me not to let them pressure me into having a cesarean.. Because I don’t need one. “Oh, mom“. I snorted, “They’re not gonna give me a cesarean“. Plus I didn’t want one. I had no desire to be cut open and a baby yanked out of the incision. I was all up for a natural child birth. I wanted to experience it, to know what everyone meant when they tried to explain what giving birth was like. All the women in my family had natural healthy uncomplicated births and without pain medication. There was no reason I was gonna be an exception.
“We need to operate now“. Said the doctor shaking her head as she snapped off her gloves. “She needs a cesarean”.
“Ah, no I don’t”.
“No she doesn’t” Samuel repeated to the doctor.
“Yes, she does”. Insisted the doctor.
“She says you do”.
We spent a good amount of time arguing, I was in tears and exhausted. She refused to let me have a natural childbirth. She said it was too dangerous… dangerous? More like a little inconvenient for you to wait on someone to go through labor. Why not just cut her open? Her reasoning was that my water had broken more than twelve hours ago and I wasn’t dialated enough and there was risk of infection for the baby. Okay… somehow I missed all that in all the books I read and the wealth of information I went though on the internet. She said if I wanted a natural childbirth, I’d have to find another hospital. At that point, I really didn’t feel like running around the city to find another hospital only for them to possibly tell me the same thing.
Fine.. Do it. I said exasperated, taking a big swig of water. “No”! everyone shouted together. What do I know about surgery? Well, if I’d known I wouldn’t have eaten that big plate of pasta a couple hours before hand either. A few minutes later, a nurse came and whisked me away. I waved goodbye to Samuel and my mom (no one is allowed in the delivery room either) as they disappeared around the couner. The nurse led me to a long room filled with women in labor, in recovery or on bed rest. She showed me to my bed, with no sheets or blankets or pillows.. I knew nothing about the hospitals in Sao Goncalo. I didn’t realize I had to bring all my own things.. Sheets, soap.. absolutely everything. She had me strip down and put on a hospital gown, which they did provide, and left me there. I quick whipped out my ’Mayo Clinic’s Guide to a Healthy Pregnancy” I had in my purse and flipped open to the minuscule section on cesarean births. Might as well study up real quick before they come get me, I knew nothing about cesareans. After a few minuets she came back for me. It is time. A couple nurses led me by the arms to the operating room. “Ah.. Americana! Obama.. Ele e bonito! Ela gosta de Obama”.
The surgery it’s self went very smoothly. They obviously knew what they were doing. Lots and lots of practice I suppose. They did an epidermal block on me which left the whole bottom half of my body totally numb and lifeless. All I felt was some tugging and pressure. The anesthesiologist was friendly and spoke good English which was comforting. I couldn’t see anything that they were doing because of the sheet they put up, but at a certain point, I felt a lot of pressure and a really strange surging feeling. I gasped and grabbed the poles on either side of me. He assured me it was normal. Good. A few seconds later, I heard little sniffles and a soggy little baby with the umbilical cord hanging appeared from around sheet.. “Oh, he has hair….” I said to no one. And he disappeared again.
They stitched me up and slid me onto a stretcher and wheeled me back into the room amongst the crowd of women. I was then heaved me awkwardly onto the bed as I grabbed at the mattress with my elbows so I wouldn’t fall. Well, there you go. And they left me. In the meantime Samuel had dropped off some sheets and pillow and they were next to the bed, but I was feeling a little out of it to think how to ask in Portuguese for someone to hand them to me so I stuffed my bag under my head and laid there. All alone. I couldn’t feel my legs. Hum. What just happened? Did I just have a baby? I felt my abdomen. Yep, empty. Where is he? I didn’t even get to touch him. Now what? Visiting hours weren’t until 3pm the next day. So I just laid there, numb from the waist down and tried to sleep.
The next morning a doctor came in. “Bom dia maninas”. Good morning girls. She around and took our vitals. There were about fifteen other women sharing the room. Don’t look at my catheter sack! Every so often a nurse would come in with the list a names and do a call off. “Aqui”! Here! Dayanee kat..katee…Kalee..Katin…? That’s probably me. And I’d raise my hand from my place. They’d then pass out pills and food. Did you have a cesarean or normal? A cesarean, oh, can you eat yet? I don’t know, can I? can I get up? Can someone tell me something? A nurse came to take my pressure. Ah….meu filho? My son? Quando?
Apparently they wanted to run some tests on him so I didn’t get hold him until that day. About noon a nurse came in and handed me a little baby. The fuzziest little baby I’d ever seen. Well, there you go. And she left. I sat there alone in my bed surrounded by the buzzing of the talking of all other women in the room. Ah, hello. It was like meeting a little stranger for the first time. Is this really mine? The girls in the beds on either side of me told me how cute he was. He spit up and pooped...Ah... what was that I'm suppose to do now? Thankfully one of the girls on who was there on bed rest came to help.
Finally three o'clock came and the room suddenly filled which what seemed like a hundred people all talking excitedly. Samuel and mom came to my bedside and we finally got to be together as a little family for the first time. "He's beautiful"!! we shouted to eachother over the talking of all the other people.

The pain medication started wearing off the third day. I hurt soo bad but I was so extremely anxious to leave. I did my best to hold myself to seem normal I was afraid they’d make me stay if they knew how bad I hurt. I thought I was going to die. My insides felt like they were going to fall out. Really. But when they gave the go ahead, I was ready. I did try asking one of the nurses if it was normal to hurt like this. Yes. Oh, okay. Any other instruction? anyone? I guess you're just suppose to know these things. Stupid me.
We signed out and I slowly shuffled out the door and back into the 100 degree weather. We got into a taxi and made our way to the apartment, cringing at every little bump along the way.
But we made it and little matteo is alive and healthy. Thats all that matters. I've healed up nicely as well along with a cool looking scar. Ha. However, You'll probably find me in Minnesota for my next childbirth.

I need some fresh air...

well, Samuel's mother, aunt, sister, niece, cousin and her kids went to his sister's house for the weekend leaving samuel, his dad, matteo and his niece's two hamsters, bird and myself "alone" in our two bedroom 4th floor apartment for a bit. It got to be a little crowded i must say, especially for the fact that you cant just step outside for some FRESH air. Once you get outside its onto a busy dusty exahsty street with crazy drivers. Its not good to leave the window open for long periods because it faces the street and that dirty air comes in and forms a layer of dust... but then if we dont leave it open, mildew forms on things because of the warm, moist air caused by drying clothes and sheets in the windows because theres no place or way to dry them. Am impossible situation. On a possitive note, Pedro and Marina are back together in "insensato coracao". Right now the Golobo Repoter, pronounced Hey-po-tayr is on tv.. they're doing a special on the fests of june, festivals that go on all june and the rest of the winter.. here winter is june, july and august... festivals which we are not partaking in this year...cuz we have no car, no money and a little baby. they look pretty though. Needless to say, i'm ready to go home... which will be very soon hopefully. just need this stupid police certificate thing from Italy and find a traslator. but anyway.. yeah..uh..just heard the toilet flush a third time...fourth...these pull string toilets dont have a of umpf. no toilet paper in the toilet.. or big terds for that matter.. you'll be in there all night flushing. believe me.

brazilian fluff

so, since little matteo is a brazilian citizen as well as american, he needs both passports, the brazilian to leave brazil and american to enter america. this morning, after fighting with the stroller to get on and off buses, searching for a caixa to pay the fee while trying to keep matteo happy, we finally arrived at the federal police station to register for his passport. Unfortunately, we got there too late.. apparently they only do ten people a day. sigh..."that sucks", I thought. "AAHHHH!!! %*!@!! A COUNTRY FILLED WITH IDIOTS!! AH! #*&@"!! Samuel shouted. so we sadly wandered into the center of Niteroi, a lovely the city across the bay from Rio. As I pushed Matteo along attempting to avoid potholes and listening to Samuel's lamenting, I spotted a guy selling some sort of white fluff from his cart... I wanted white fluff. I inturrupted samuel to asked what it was. cuscuz. tapioca balls covered in coconut shavings and drizzled with sweetened condensed milk. very nice. so that was the good part of the day. white fluff.